Now, I am the biggest advocate for December 21, 2012. I’ve actually been banking on it the past few years. Wells Fargo and the Government can’t find me if the world is ending, right? Honestly though, I thought I was the only person who actually believed the world was going to end soon. But after spending the last 8 hours watching the Discovery Channel, I clearly was wrong. That has me somewhat frightened. So, there’s actually millions of other people including scientists at Harvard and shit who think this is actually a possibility, not just some random guy in his basement claiming a Rapture? Oh god. Either way, this has got me thinking about how the world is actually going to end on Friday. In my personal opinion, I just think Friday will be the beginning of the end. Something rather catastrophic will happen that will set things in motion. Maybe something like a natural disaster, or Obama doing something right for once in office, or just something very unusual that will make your first instinct be, “oh shit, where’s my Mayan calender?”
The Discovery Channel is definitely pulling for a zombie apocalypse. Showing all these sickos who are actually prepping for the Walking Dead to be reality. I kind of dig it though. There’s nothing wrong with being prepared. These are definitely the people who are at the grocery store buying every battery and gallon of water possible when the weather man says we are getting 2 inches of snow. Zombie apocalypse checklist: Shotgun, knife/machete, food, water, pistol, ammo. And yeah this would probably be the one time I don’t forget to bring my phone charger somewhere I think a zombie apocalypse would be awesome. Minus the having to live in the middle of nowhere hoping there isn’t someone trying to bite your face off behind you. According to the CDC though, there is no zombie epidemic, and taking bath salts make you eat someones face off, naked in Miami. Best. Cover-up. Ever.
Other people think that there is going to be like a huge wave of water that just tsunami’s us all. Or solar flares that burn our faces off. Or gas build up blowing up the Earth’s crust. All very valid options. These are the last things I want to happen. There’s no fun in just one second and poof there goes the world. There has to be some drama in it all. Has anyone ever just thought that maybe, just maybe, that one Mayan guy was just really tired from carving out 5,000 years of calender into his stone tablet and pulled a Forrest Gump and just said ” I’m kind of tired, I think I’ll go home now”.
So what do you guys think? Vote on the poll and let me know how the world will end on Friday. If you have any other ideas feel free to comment too. But do it before Friday or else we’ll never know.
5. Season 5 of Mad Men- If you haven’t watched Mad Men before, you are missing out on probably the best show on television. Don Draper is the man, and working in an advertising agency where you drink all day and get paid is awesome. You have a few weeks before the new season starts so go on Netflix and catch up.
4. Summer Olympics in London- I’m not sure why but I was really into the last Summer Olympic games. Maybe it was just because of Michael Phelps but I am excited to watch again this year. Hopefully Jerome Simpson will be representing the USA in gymnastics so we can finally beat those 10 year olds from China. Simpson’s frontflip last week could have cleared ten of those Chinese girls easily. I wonder if Phelps is in the years Olympics? Probably not since he’s been pokin the smot lately.
3. Season 5 of Jersey Shore- I am excited for Jersey Shore to be over. I do enjoy the show but it is embarrassing. The fact that these idiots are making hundreds of thousands of dollars to make a fool of themselves makes me want to throw up/ sign up to be on the next season. Get drunk, fight people, and visit other countries and get paid for it sounds pretty good but thank god it’s the last season. Salud to that.
2. Barak Obama being voted out of Office (fingers crossed)- Come on America. I don’t care who you vote for, I don’t care if Mickey Mouse wins as a write in this year. As long as Obama is not in office I will be happy. That guy has done nothing good for this country and spends all his time filling out college basketball brackets and going to sporting events. How about you do some work and get some people some jobs.
1. December 21, 2012- The Mayans predicted it. It must be true. But thank God. My college loan payments of roughly $80,000 are set to start being paid in December 2012, so lets hope those Mayans were right. What are the Mayans going to do if it doesn’t happen though? Their calendar ends that day, everything they have been living for. Whatever. Plus, if the world ends then Obama certainly can’t run this country for another 4 years regardless of the amount of idiots who vote for him. December 20th will be a night to remember, or probably not remember. And that picture is exactly how I see it happening. All of us just like avatars floating into the sky. Sure, why not.
Tebow's World 